My blog now

So I started this blog out for Grandpa Sessions but I think it was just one of those things that he rolled his eyes at. Not that he rolls his eyes often, I just seem to always have another "Great Idea". I'm learning that people don't really take ownership of an idea unless they take part in creating it. I know there are exceptions to that statement but I'm just saying in general people are more likely to jump on board with both feet if they help build the ship. So this blog was intended to be a place that Grandpa Sessions could write out his thoughts, feelings, stories in a place that was easy to find for all of his kids, grand kids, and so on. He is an incredible example of journal writing and I selfishly wanted him to do his journal online so it would be easier for his kids to read when he passes. Not that I think he is going to pass anytime soon, I just thought it was a good idea. He never really got into it so I think I'm going to take it over. I've never been a journal writer, not even on my LDS mission. As I'm growing up I'm starting to see the value in keeping a journal. I really wish I could have know my Grandpa as an adult. I hope my kids get to know my Dad as an adult. I want my kids to know me now and not just get to know me in the future. Being a father is a scary thing with a lot of responsibilities. I'm still a bit in awe that I have someone that calls me Dad! There is no instruction guide for this job and I really wish I had one. Despite feeling a bit lost and overwhelmed as a parent some days, the bond you develop with your kids is something incredible. I sat here thinking of an appropriate adjective to describe being a parent and incredible is all i could come up with. It produces a love/bond unlike anything else I know. I want to be there for my kids when they are at this stage in life. Not as an old man but as someone their age that they can sympathize with. My hope and prayer for this blog is that its a place that I can be honest and open about what I'm going through as a father and a Man. I wan't to know myself better and I want my wife and kids to know me better as well. I'm not going t hold myself to any kind of posting schedule because I don't want this blog to be something that becomes a chore. I also don't want to feel like a failure if I go "dark" for a few days. I also don't want to feel like everything I post here has to be well written. I have this distaste for writing because it feels so permanent. I'm a horrible speller and I have this weird need for everything to be well done. So I'm going to allow myself to just write and how ever the posts come out, they come out!